“Never being popular as a kid was always an insecurity for me. Even as an adult, I still have recurring flashbacks of sitting at lunch tables alone or hiding in a bathroom stall, or trying to make a new friend and being laughed at. In my twenties I found myself surrounded by girls who wanted to be my friend. So I shouted it from the rooftops, posted pictures, and celebrated my newfound acceptance into a sisterhood, without realizing that other people might still feel the way I did when I felt so alone. It’s important to address our long-standing issues before we turn into the living embodiment of them.”
-Helpful advice from Taylor Swift, in the March 2019 issue of Elle
Have you ever had one of those really, really, really bad days? How does it measure up to the really bad day experienced by the woman I’m about to discuss?
Firefighters were called to the top of Mount Walker in Washington to rescue a woman who fell headfirst into an outhouse. After hiking to the summit, she needed to do her business. But while sitting on the porta potty toilet, she accidentally dropped her cell phone into the stinky abyss. You can tell a lot about a person in a situation such as this…like whether their phone is important enough that they’re willing to dig through raw human sewage to retrieve it. (Let’s be honest: the number of takers i this scenario is probably far higher than anyone care admit.)
So she devised a plan to retrieve her beloved object. Using dog leashes as a type of harness system, she rigged something up to hold herself in place while she reached down to fish through the muck. I’m sure you can guess what happens next.
“They didn’t work very well and in she went,” says Brinnon Fire Department Chief Tim Manly. On a side note, I’ve never seen such a fittingly cool name for a fire chief.
Now stuck in the outhouse gunk, she apparently managed to find her phone and dial 9-1-1. Rescue workers arrived and graciously pulled the woman out. They offered her medical attention, but she declined, saying she only wanted to leave. I get it. She was deeply embarrassed. Especially in front of the Manly firefighter. I just hope they were able to at least hose her off before sending her on her merry way.
So you see? Whatever type of bad day you thought you had probably doesn’t seem so bad anymore. That, and we should all probably empty our pockets and leave our phones holstered before sitting down in an outhouse.
1. The Week, 5-6-2022, p. 12
2. picture creditroadside porta potty by bondidwhat
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